The funny thing about bullshit is that when someone is called out on it, THEY are the ones that're offended. How does that work? You tried to essentially lie to me, and I exposed your "facts" as folly, and you are the one that's taken back?! Can you please explain to me how?
It all comes down to this; these Bullshitters, are displeased with the fact that you're intelligence level is higher than theirs and you were able to see through the transparent lie/story/what-have-you that they told. So then what happens is, they go into defense mode and attempt to continue the foolery by actually believing their own lie or story. This way they can "act" realistic. But the part that said Bullshitter isn't calculating, is that people like myself are also highly intuitive.
I may smile politely or nod along to keep the conversation going, especially with new Bullshitters that I've just met. I like to get a feel for people, and the extent of their bullshit, before continuing on. And that's not to say that I just assume everyone is bullshitting me. You can feel it. There's an energy there. Sometimes it isn't that they're bullshitting others, but actually bullshitting themselves as well.
Those are the professionals because they've been consumed by their bullshit and believe it thoroughly. These sort of people generally have bad juju around them, and that's not to say that they're bad people, they just unconsciously deny themselves the chance of a freer life because they can't face the truth. Whatever the truth may be. No matter how deep it may be. Usually involving insecurities of their own that they project in various "smoke & mirrors" sort of way.
These sort of people dislike people such as myself because, while I still don't have it all figured out, I do at the very least, know myself outstandingly well. And they're envious of such an accomplishment. It takes much time and introspection to learn oneself, and it isn't always easy figuring out and/or facing the truth about the way you are or think.
Staying optimistic is always the best option, although being bitter and sarcastic has it's comedic relief too. I just try to stay away from these Bullshitters that cloud my energy. They're also capable of stealing your energy, should you let them. And that's a tricky feat in itself.
Ever feel great one moment and after an experience with another person, you feel drained and dehydrated? It could very well be a simple conversation, about simple things or simple people--but you walk away from it feeling empty and confused. What caused that? What was that?
The Bullshitters are offended that you don't buy their product, and the Non-Bullshitters are offended that you'd try to sell them a crappy, non-authentic product. That's bad salesmanship.
You should be honest and real as often as you can, even in professional settings. Now, please don't be mistaken, I'm not suggesting that you should be disrespectful, I'm saying that you should 100% of the time be real to YOU. That means politely questioning things, even superiors. Since when has that been illegal? That means speaking up when something or someone is unjust. You'd want someone to speak up for you. That means being fair, even if that means you don't get the reward. Because the reward IS being fair. At least it should be.
I know I went on a tangent but it's all relative. People create these facades--these masks to wear in public, to get others to accept them, to blend in, etc., and they wear these masks for so long that they very rarely ever take them off. So when faced with someone who doesn't have those issues comes about, I swear, the Bullshitters just shut down or they bullshit even more! And a person like me gets labeled as what? Having an attitude problem, being offensive, not "staying in my place", abrasive, rebellious, angsty, indifferent? If you can't be real with someone you're supposed to be engaging with, a natural exchange--not necessarily swapping life stories--although there's nothing wrong with that. Being personal is one of the best things you can be. A helluva lot better than being a bullshitter, you should take a serious look at yourself and what's holding you back from just being you. And you should let those insecurities go.
No one should be a prisoner inside themselves.
And that's what you bullshitters are.
Little prisoners that drag everyone else into your dark, damp, hollow cell that you call your personality.
What is it that we're all looking for? And when we find it, how is it that, we end up still looking for something else? When is it ever enough? I've asked this question over and over again. Would we even be able to figure out what 'enough' is or was??
I always played the numbers game with my mental breakdowns or lack thereof. Time just makes me so complacent, no matter where I am. Ha. No matter where I am, I always feel like I should be somewhere else. Whaddaya call that?!
I'm not sure I ever really knew where my place in the world was supposed to be. It's not as if I feel like I belong anywhere. Like I belong nowhere and everywhere all at once. Leading this hurricane of emotion and curiosity towards the brink of my demise. And I know it seems slightly off, but I've been a lot more morbid than usual. Mainly at night. I've been often wondering if I'll open my eyes the next day. And I'm not too upset about it, it almost feels as if it's supposed to happen that way.
But being the curious person that I am, it does make me sad because I AM unaware of what's to come. What follows death? They never come back to tell us, do they? Like it's one big surprise that everyone has to discover on their own.
Maybe it's like everyone on Earth is collecting pieces of their own puzzle. Putting them together to get the big picture. Some people complete their puzzle, some people never find the missing pieces, and some people's ending image isn't what they thought they were putting together.
I'm as rambly as a drunken sailor. Just feelin' a little under the weather emotionally, is all...
Okay, so I realize my absence .... hasn't been noticed by anyone. Ha! But lookie!! That furry wittle face above has been keeping me smiling and (somewhat) active. He's my excuse and YOUR distraction from the fact that I haven't written anything substantial in the last five months, maybe more.
It's coming. It's all coming soon. Just be patient, my pretties...
It's been a little bit since the last time I tuned in. Same shit, different toilet paper. However!! I AM very much looking forward to my visit back home. One week. No work. All rest and play. I can't wait to see all my family and friends. Then of course, do what we do best... party our faces off.
Upon my return to sunny, hotter than hell itself, California, I intend to hit the job circuit harder than I've ever hit it before. Because, honestly, this can't be life. Crap pay at some Dental Lab? No, no, nooo. I think not.
Very interested in seeing what the future holds for yours truly. Welp, time to roll the dice.
I've recently celebrated my very last 20-something birthday. I realize most people make bigger deals for their 21st and their 30th and so on. But I've always been a stickler for the ends of things. Because, and this has been said many times, when things end, you usually think about the beginning. That's the beauty of it for me. Ten years ago I had a huge Berfday bash when I turned 19...
It marked the end of my teenage years and the beginning of a new journey. I'd never have or celebrate another teenage birthday in this lifetime. It was something sad and beautiful.
Much like now.
I'll never have another 20-something birthday for as long as I live in this current existence. So here I am. Almost 30 and still swimming in the pool of limbo. So many changes life has brought to my doorstep. Some are very nice packages, wrapped beautifully and the contents are even more amazing. And others, well, they can't all be winners with giant bows of satin. The way I look at it, as long as I keep those smiles genuinely on my face, I'll know I am/was having fun.
Because that's all that really ever mattered right? Happiness? I believe so.